Well. See. I’m a bit of a perfectionist.
So I decided to drop all the tables and do a clean import of my greymatter entries. I still couldn’t get the page to load on my machine (grr… why?!) but I found someone to hit “okay” for me ^_^
Anyway, for my first real entry here… I’m doing a survey!
HOW ASIAN ARE YOU? [bold if true]
1. Your mother has short hair thata^£á^(TM)s curly, perm, or dyed.
Oh dear goodness, ALL THREE.
2. Your dada^£á^(TM)s some sort of engineer.
3. Your parents still tried to get you into places by saying you were 12 when you were really 15.
Eh heh heh heh… more like my mom trying to avoid the sales tax. “It’s for a child under 15?” “Yes.”
4. You ask your parents help on 1 math problem & 2 hours later, theya^£á^(TM)re still lecturing.
I never ask my parents for help in math >_> Calculus? WOOSH.
5. You have a 40 lb bag of rice in your pantry.
Sadly, yes. ;_;
6. You shop 99 Ranch.
What?
7. Everyone thinks youa^£á^(TM)re a^£áoeChinesea^£á? no matter what part of Asia your ancestors were from.
Um…. this is weird, since I am Chinese, but people think I’m Korean a lot of the time…
8. Youa^£á^(TM)ve had a bowl haircut at one point in your life.
Mm-hmm.
9. Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friendsa^£á^(TM) kids.
Not really, they don’t have friend with kids my age 😀
10. Youa^£á^(TM)ve had to sit through karaoke videos w/ scantily clad, Asian women attempting to dance & walk around a temple, forest, or library.
Don’t ask. Really.
11. Your parents say, a^£áoeDona^£á^(TM)t forget your heritage.a^£á?
Actually, it’s, “If you don’t speak Chinese you’ll be ashamed when you grow up.”
12. You or your parents drive mostly Japanese cars.
Yep, my dad figures they’re more efficient than American ones.
13. Youa^£á^(TM)ve learned to keep bargaining even if the prices are rock bottom.
14. Youa^£á^(TM)ve had to eat parts of animals they dona^£á^(TM)t even put in hot dogs.
Heh. And I like it! XP
15. At least once, youa^£á^(TM)ve started a joke w/ a^£áoeConfucius saya^£á?.a^£á?
16. You know what bok choy is.
Who doesn’t?
17. Youa^£á^(TM)ve gotten little red envelopes around February.
Oh yes @_@ Love my lucky money 😀
18. Piles of shoes tend to make it hard to open the front, back, & closet doors.
19. You hear (your name + eee (optional) + yah!) everytime someone calls you.
;_;
20. You have no eyelashes.
I have very short ones >_>;
21. Idiot people try to impress you w/ pathetic imitation Asian languages, like the ever-so-popular: a^£áoeChing chong woo bok chia^£á? etca^£á?
That’s my mother trying to imitate Korean/Japanese/Tagalog.
22. Your parents say leaving rice in your bowla^£á^(TM)s a sin.
23. The Bio lectures on marine life (seaweed, sea cucumbers, octopii) was last nighta^£á^(TM)s dinner.
24. Your ancestors 1000 generations back invented the back scratcher.
— what happened to 25?
26. Your parents hover over your tired, caffeine-drugged body @ 12am to say, a^£áoeIn our country, we studied even more.a^£á?
27. Your parents expect youa^£á^(TM)ll be best friends w/ any one off the street in any given area as long as they are Asian.
28. An Asian woman comes on campus & people ask, a^£áoeIs that your mother? No? Well then, is that your sister?a^£á?
Too many Asians here for that to happen XD
29. Your relativesa^£á^(TM) houses smell like incense, mothballs or both.
Certains entre eux.
30. Your parents say, a^£áoeCalculus? I took Calculus in Grade 8!a^£á?
Heh. No comment.
31. Everyone thinks youa^£á^(TM)re good @ math.
32. Your parentsa^£á^(TM) vocabularya^£á^(TM)s filled w/ a^£áoeAiya!a^£á? & a^£áoeWah!a^£á?
And mine too, it’s only fair to add.
33. You like $1.75 movies.
Never been to one.
34. You like $1.50 movies even more.
Oh, I see where this is going.
35. Your aunts and uncles bring you back adorable clothing from Asia with fuzzy bunnies, vinyl ducks, and English words that make no sense, in great colors like yellow, pink, magenta, orange, and the ever popular lime green.
Yeah.
36. Your parents insist you marry within your race.
Actually, we’ve never talked about this… not like I’m going to get married any time soon, though. The only admonition with respects to marriage that I remember is… “Don’t marry someone with the same last name!”
37. You never order chop suey, sweet & sour pork, or any other imitation of oriental food.
Well… duh.
38. You either really, really want to go to UCI or really, really want to stay away from it.
39. Your parents have never kissed you.
Not that I remember, certainly.
40. Your parents have never kissed each other.
Only in wedding photos.
41. You learned about the birds and the bees from someone other than your parents.
Hello grade five sex ed teacher.
42. a^£áoeYou want a stereo?! When I was your age, I didna^£á^(TM)t even have shoes!a^£á?
Yep. This is why I never bother asking for things.
43. People see a bunch of scribbles on a chopstick & ask you to translate.
No, because everyone knows how bad my Chinese is.
44. You have to address all your parenta^£á^(TM)s friends as a^£áoeAunty & Uncle.a^£á?
Uh-huh. It’s just easier that way.
45. You have 12+ aunts & uncles.
Um…. lesse… 5+5 = 10 blood uncles, 4+2 = 6 blood aunts, and their assorted spouses. Easily 25.
46. At expensive restaurants, you order a delicious glass of water for your beverage & NEVER order dessert.
I have never been to an expensive restaurant.
47. Your parents simply cut the green/black part off the bread & say, a^£áoeEat anyway; ita^£á^(TM)s still good.a^£á?
Actually, no. Well, maybe once…
48. The vast majority of the people related to you wear glasses.
*thinking* No.
49. You will most likely be taller than your parents.
I am taller than my mother. I won’t be taller than my dad though.
50. Your parents have either made you play the piano, the violin, or both.
51. You get nothing if you do well in school, but crapped on if you dona^£á^(TM)t.
Only half true. Well, it depends how you define “bad.” I thought a B in Math was bad. Turned out it wasn’t.
52. When going to other peoplea^£á^(TM)s houses, you always have to bring a gift.
*shrugs* Depends.
53. Your dad still pulls his socks up to his knees; you know, the ones w/ the blue and pink stripes at the top.
54. Your family owns a tennis racquet, golf clubs, or both.
55. Your family always cheers for the Asian athlete on TV.
It’s easy when they pwn the other countries >D
56. The furniture in your house never matches the wallpaper, the carpet, the decorations, or any of the rest of the furniture.
YEP.
57. You have rocks, sticks, leaves, & strange-smelling, unknown substances in your pantry for use as medicine.
58. You own a rice cooker or two.
59. You buy soy sauce by the gallon.
60. Your family owns butcher knives bigger than your head.
61. Your parents tell you about how long it took for them to get to school, how horrible the weather was in their native country, and how much they still appreciated going.
62. Your parents buy you clothes & shoes many sizes too big so you can a^£áoegrow into ita^£á? & wear it for years to come.
Or my mom just doesn’t like seeing me in clothes that actually fit >_>;
63. Your parents believes in Feng Shui.
64. Your parents are very conservative & think that tank tops/halters/spaghetti straps show too much skin.
Yep. “My daughter would never wear anything that sexy!”
65. Every time your parents lecture you, they always make up excuses that relate to everything youa^£á^(TM)ve done in the past.
It’s like they never forget a thing.
66. You eat rice everyday.
67. You like JIN.
???
68. When you were little, your parents beat you with sticks & stuff. Rotan and wooden rulers. Try a wooden spoon, god damnit.
69. The adults fight for the bill when you go out for dinner.
And dim sum, and everything else.
Bobby Says: